Wednesday, 6 July 2011

maybe it's because...

mind the gap

On almost every Tube station there is some posters of a campaign by CBS, if I remember correctly called "Maybe it's because you're a Londoner". It tells a series of "statistics data" (taken who knows where) about what being a Londoner means compared to being part of the remaining British and world population (aka the filthy others): there is a lot of crap about Londoners reading more international newspapers, being more interested in cultural events, having more statistical chances of being opinion leader (???), etc. etc.
And then there is a whole array of moronic statements about being one of those commuter that manages to have a coffee cup glued to one hand, a book on the other and still manages to stand and balance on the Victoria line at peak time, or living in the area with the highest concentration of top managers of the whole country.
Every time I wait for a train and my eyes make the mistake of focusing on one of these posters, I feel extremely annoyed.

Maybe it's because I'm not a Londoner that I find most of London's opinionated people are just wankers.

Maybe it's because I'm not a Londoner that I find people eating on the tube filthy and disgusting.

Maybe it's because I'm not a Londoner that I find the only place we should put top managers is in a Welsh coal mine, just to remember them what "work" mean and avoid them to fuck up our lives even further.

So, as you may guess, I'm not very fond of the campaign, nor of the concept of "life in London, as a Londoner".

Yesterday afternoon I went to get an haircut: my hair have the bad habit of growing too fast and with the heat in Torino they are unbereable. Never mind what everybody around me tells me, "You should have been here last week, now it's not that hot anymore", it's still annoying.

So, as my trusted hairdresser is off in maternity leave, I decided to go to one next to my parents' place.
That's the faithful recount of the beginning of our conversation.
Hairdresser: "I haven't seen you around here, have you just moved in the neighbourhood?"
Me: "No, I don't live here, I came back to Italy to visit my family."
Hairdresser: "So you don't live in Italy!"
Me: "No, I migrated abroad. I..."
Hairdresser: "Let me guess... You live in England, in London!"
Surprised Me: "Yeah, how do you know?"
Hairdresser: "Oh well, the way you speak, move, dress, your style... you look like a Londoner!"
Depressed ME: "Sigh"

F*********************************k, I need to do something! change my wardrobe, tan a little, move to quiet Greece...

1 comment:

  1. I agree about hating silly "campaigns"! Here in un-lovely Mississippi there's a similar one "Mississippi: Believe It!" created by some ad agency and it is SO annoying, citing all the "great" things about our state. Never mind the HORRIBLE things, like: World's Fattest People, Highest Illegitimate Teen Birth Rate in the USA, Most Poor People, and just today we learned that Mississippi also leads the nation in COLON cancer! "Believe it!":):)