Thursday, 21 February 2013

I'm on a (yarn) diet

About this time last year, the video "Shit New Yorkers say" went viral on YouTube.
Barely the time to finish watching it and the web was packed with similar video, all aptly named "Shit any random category of people of your choice say"

Needless to say, there was one about knitters too.
Aside the glasses and mention of an husband, that's basically me:



So, one of the things I find myself saying over and over is "I'm on a yarn diet". I repeat it like a Buddhist mantra. Hear me mumble: yarn diet yarn diet yarn diet I'm on a yarn diet.
Yarn diet works pretty much the same way as chocolate (or any other) diet does: it simply doesn't.

First of all, it seems that the biorhythm of my stash is doomed to be in a perpetual out of synch state with the biorhythm of my project queue. Then, when I travel, I like to buy some yarn, to support local products. Better than a fridge magnet anyway, especially cause my fridge door is covered by a wooden panel that makes fridge magnet a nice souvenir to give to my sis instead.

Just like chocolate diet, one thinks that proclaiming the yarn diet to the whole world is going to make it work. As if  by stating it out loud, people around you will immediately understand you. Magic!
Right. Have you ever said you were on a diet to friends and family? Noticed how once you said it to people, you get invited to parties, aperitif  and dinners or offered cookies and cakes in the office?
Yep, people do not understand. So in the moment you say something like you're on yarn diet, here's somebody showing you a new yarn or points you to a nice pattern on Ravelry.

The worse is that, just like with all other diets, when you break the rules, you break them bad. You go over the board. You wake up the day after in a daze, feeling guilty and locating the source of the guilt in 3 skeins of cobweb yarn on the kitchen table.

"WTF? That's the last time I'm on a yarn diet!", that's the silent yet solemn promise I made over and over to myself.
It contains one fundamental yet often ignored truth: no more diet because dieting is the wrong approach.
Just like moderation and exercise for our body, moderation and destashing are the way to go for knitting.
One should never diet, yet ends up doing it anyway.

Why am I talking about all this? Well, ça va sans dire: I'm on a diet!
I ended up doing it anyway, despite the fact I know I'm bound to fail.
But there's no other way to go for me at the moment. A big trip is planned for this year: it will consists of more than 2 days spent sitting on planes and around 2 weeks in the land of Vegemite.
It's going to be expensive and I'll have to cut here and there to accommodate the trip: less travels back to Torino, dropping it to once a month. Less dinner and drinks out. Where I can cut, I'll do it.

Obviously I had to put myself on a diet for this trip: so here I am, on a yarn diet. Have been for about one week and half.
Overall is going well. Overall I'm lying. I'm crappy and sour, well more than I normally am.

Good thing I can cheer myself a little bit by browsing through the pages of this book I just got myself:


Crap.
Need to start a book diet too! First thing... tomorrow.

1 comment:

  1. You know that I know just exactly how it feels to have a yarn stash that's too big. You're drowning in it.

    The worst thing is that I recently started to knit several projects from my yarn stash. I'm even getting close to them being FOs (yeah, surprises me too) - and the problem is: I don't really like them? I'm just not keen on the yarn.

    I think I need to go out and buy more...

    PS: I'm not buying those same yarns again. I want to buy different ones. (that's good, right?)

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